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More on Damon, or Damon the Moron

by Mike DePilla
Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Sox fans think Ozzie Guillen is delusional for believing his "rotating-DH-of-below-average-oft-injured-old-bench-players" is a plan for success. While it is pretty scary to acknowledge that kind of thought process is shaping our team, there is one lost soul out there who is at least in the same ballpark of delusion.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the ultimate king of delusion.

Now, I get that there is a lot of ego and self-absorption involved in baseball players, their drive and their performance. Crippled by self-doubt, today's Alex Rodriguez or Jake Peavy turns into tomorrow's Dontrelle Willis or Neal Cotts. And there's no doubt that Damon is as vain as they come. Just take a look at the guy's personal web site.

But if Johnny Damon actually believes he will receive a two-year deal worth a full eight digit salary each year, I have a bridge in Brooklyn I'd like to sell him.

When Damon wasn't spouting nonsense, his super villain agent Scott Boras took over for him. Losing suitors quickly, Boras found a roundabout way to connect his client to the Detroit Tigers.

“Johnny believes the addition of him to Detroit’s lineup would make the Tigers a winner,” Scott Boras, Damon’s agent, said during a Monday phone conversation.

Boras added, quoting Damon before Damon signed earlier contracts with the Yankees and Boston Red Sox: “I told you I could make the Yankees a winner, and I told you before I left Oakland (where he played in 2001) I could make a Boston a winner.”

Boras says Damon has the same disposition toward the Tigers in 2010: “I can make the Detroit Tigers a winner,” Boras said, citing Damon’s words to him in December.

Right, because it was Damon that turned that loser Yankee franchise around and sent them to the World Series last year. He may have looked like Jesus back then, but he ain't no savior.

There was even a rumor floated that Damon was considering retirement if he didn't receive a big enough offer somewhere. Look, creating a market for yourself is one thing, this is throwing yourself at someone when you're worried you're going to leave the bar alone.

How does this all tie to the Sox? Not that much, except there is no way Kenny, Ozzie and Jerry would do anything but laugh--loudly-- if Boras presented an $11 million contract proposal to them. I still don't think the Sox will end up with Damon, but things might get interesting as reality sets in. Could Boras, the guy who magically got an injured Magglio Ordonez and a horrific Andruw Jones insane guaranteed money from the Tigers and Dodgers, really admit defeat with Damon?

Well, who's left to even bid for the guy? The Tigers, the Rays, maybe the Braves. A couple also-rans like the Reds and A's could get involved, but it's sure looking like $6 million or maybe $7 million is as good as it's going to get for this guy. And spring training is fast approaching.

Get the popcorn out, because Damon and Boras will eventually have to swallow their pride and accept a small offer, and when they do it's going to be goooood watching (like a hilarious boat giveaway scam).


  1. The Tigers would be nuts to sign Damon. They already have enough risk with Ordonez and Guillen in their lineup. Besides that, Damon won't hit 24hrs moving from a little league field to a football field. They also appear to be making a youth movement.

    If Damon came down to $5M, then I wouldn't be suprised if the White Sox signed him.

  2. You're right, there is no way on God's green Earth that Damon hits 20 homers at Comerica (unless he does it Brady Anderson-style).

    I doubt he'll make it all the way down to $5 million, but if he does I'd be disappointed if the Sox don't get involved.